Yes, this afternoon was one of those afternoons. I'm exhausted from our day at co-op and I've been having a LOT of the crazy pregnancy dreams so my sleep is way off and I don't handle that very well. I get a little grumpy. (OK, I get really really "lock me up until I get a nap" grumpy) So of course, Mr. T refused to nap and has been excessively whiny this afternoon. And it's one of those days where I am allowing myself to be an imperfect mommy. Yes, my little munchkin is watching TV. And he will be there as long as he is happy doing it. Whether it's VeggieTales, Leap Frog, or Word World as long as he is quiet and happy mommy is leaving him alone.
And this is where I am. Enjoying a delightful rose petal white tea from the Spice Market in a beautiful glass teapot and warmer combo (thank you, sweetheart for my awesome birthday gift and the pretty flowers!) and out of my favorite tea cup ever, and looking for recipes, homeschool ideas, and "having similar day" moms online. Misery and exhaustion do love company. And I like knowing that I'm not the only homeschool mom having a not so great day. It is hard to always measure up to a standard of perfection.
We have all fallen short, not just before God, but we create unrealistic expectations for ourselves. And we beat ourselves up for letting the kids watch TV or drink Kool aid (eww) at a birthday party. We didn't get all three activities done today. We didn't set a great example of patience. We didn't answer the phone because we just didn't want to. The dishes are still in the sink. The floor needs to be swept. The laundry needs to be washed or folded or put away. But right now, I am taking a break. And I think that is OK. I can quietly meditate on tender mercies "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience." Colossians 3:12. And I can breath a prayer and begin again. Even this late in the day.
But for this moment, I'm going to enjoy the beautiful tea and the lovely smell of roses and lavender and the sounds of blessed peace and quiet. And thank God that His grace and patience are so much greater toward this child than any earthly father ever could be.
